MEET SOPHIE

So I figured while i was on here, i'd introduce you all to my "puppy" Sophie!

MFP blog post!

SO MyFitnessPal (MFP) has a blog spot on their sit and the blank page was staring at me and next thing I know emotions were flowing form my hands. I thought heck why not share it with the rest of the world 2. So here's what's going on inside of my head and heart for the past week.
No this isn't a cry for "help" this is just how I feel and let's be honest we've all felt that way!!

So just like most people "fitness" is a fight for me!! The ironic thing is i teach health for a part of my job, and i "know" what works, but for some reason it hasn't worked for me.  

 A year ago i ended up in the hospital "dying" because my body had turn septic from a gallstone blockage. I was there for 3 days no water no food, i swore then that something would change in my life. for 3 months I did great!! A year has passed and now I weigh the most i have ever weighed in my life. I cried the night i found that i saw that number on the scale. I looked back and mfp and saw how at one point i weight almost 230 which for me is a BIG deal. now i'm at 274 and i can't stand it!!! wow 274 i'm almost 300lbs (i'm not even 30 years old) how did this happen!! Why did I let this happen!

 Well i know i have 2 options I can enter the depression state that ALWAYS comes with weight gain OR I can enter the motivation side of things......... here's the problem I live alone, i sleep alone, and 9 out of 10 I have to "work out" alone. people have started working out with me and then THEY bail out NOT ME! These friends are the fit ones too. dang DNA ain't fair!! But I think back to the time i was my fittest. i didn't go to they gym, i didn't run, i ate fresh foods and walked 3-4 miles everyday. Here's the difference i was in Costa Rica I had no American junk food available & no car there either! WOW hmmmmm. So i've decided to get back to the basics, clean eating and walking. That's it, that's all i'm promising to do, but I WILL DO IT!! I owe it to the person trapped inside my head who looks in the mirror and ask "who the heck are you" I can feel THAT person screaming LET ME OUT!! Let them see the true you, the fun filled you, the flirty you, the jump'n around you, the surfing you, the bike ride'n you, and yes even the mini-skirt you!

So here's to find the REAL me, and not the "world has taken over" me!!  

No this isn't a cry for "help" this is just how I feel and let's be honest we've all felt that way!!